Enjoying the weather

I absolutely love the rain, the sound it makes as it falls here is amazing because most of the time it's not followed by thunder and lightning. It's been reaalllly windy the past few days, think all that is cleared up now though because it's not even raining right now. I just enjoy this time of year. I love the warmth of the wood stove!! :)

My absence

I really didn't expect to not blog about my last post, but I think I just realized that people can COMPLETELY change and I think I am one of those people. I was brought up in a family that drank, got drunk, partied, etc just about every flipping weekend and I learned to loathe it because I saw just how absolutely STUPID people looked/acted when they were drunk. I grew up in a home that didn't actively go to any church and freely used language that was inappropriate (in my eyes). I just have changed so much since being married to Brad and regardless of what my family may think, I think I am a heck of a better person now than I was 10 years ago. I did enjoy my sister's visit, but it was NOTHING like how I planned it. We did have a lot of fun, but to be honest...we didn't spend much time together outside of roadtrips. Not that that is a big huge deal, but it wasn't what I was expecting after not seeing my sister for three years.
I guess this brings me to my most current rant...you know, family sometimes just...WOW. I have 2 parents that I love, and am most thankful for because they gave me life, but I feel so completely estranged from them that talking to my dad feels like talking to a complete stranger, and having a mother that wonders about my kids constantly but can't take five minutes out of her day to call me on my birthday when I know for a fact that she calls my sister every EVERY flipping day drives me... NUTS. Jealous? sure, who wouldn't be? I've been treated this way for 27 years and quite frankly should be used to getting the short end of the stick, but quite obviously I'm not because I'm blogging about it. I think the biggest thing for me is I just can't understand WHY...or WHAT is wrong with me that I cannot have the same love and affection given to me that is given to others. Its really not a big deal, REALLY it isn't, but you know what...I am just tired of it. I actually moved to Washington State, the decision to do that was made so much easier by the fact that I was trying to run from my problems. I am glad Washington is as beautiful and lovely as it is (and thankful for the family that I have here) because the problems followed me. But through everything...I am so thankful for the choices I have made and the life that I live. People may not like me for it, but I know that I am a better person. And if you cannot accept me for who I am, then that is your decision and it's on your shoulders, not mine.