24 Hours of Twilight

That's right, see, when we had the family reunion back in November Elka and Mrs. E joined Hila on a trip to the movies to see this and I happened to know of this awesome website...anyway, lets just say I also watched the movie Twilight, LOVED IT (except for the absolutely corny "running" scenes that I'm sure others can relate to) and so I was absolutely thrilled the other day when Hila handed me her copy to read. I do not have a lot of ME time to any degree, but I used dad being here as a way to escape into my book (hehe) Since he and Brad were watching Transformers today while he was visiting I holed away into our bedroom and finsihed it off. I started reading it late last night after Brad went to work and I stayed up until 3 in the morning (when he came home)reading it. The book, of course, was a lot better than the movie, but I'mma have to end this post because I have an absolutely uncontrollable desire to watch the movie again.. LOL

Say it isn't snow!!!

Not that I mind the snow, because I honestly do not. As a matter of fact, Brad and I are quite giddy about it, to the point where we were checking every 15 minutes last night before we went to bed to see how much more snow fell. So to give you an idea... I took pictures today of the kids playing, there's two videos, they're sideways because I couldn't rotate them, so just turn your head sideways.. We made this "ramp" for the kids which consisted of two high snow piles and a flat runway and Brad and I ran the two older kids down it a few times before we both sprained our ankles and decided they were the only ones having the fun. It's snowing right now, and pretty much has been since 2 pm yesterday.. and will for another couple of days apparently...Love you guys very much and will update you when I can!!!

Let It Snow Ho, Ho, Ho, Let It Snow!!!

So we've had a pretty fun and exciting day, and rather than have words to screw things up.. just love on my pictures a bit. Thanks Hila for telling me to take some ;)

Christmas shopping..

So, it seems every year I freak out as to how much the kids are going to get, and that in the end, they get way too much and I freak out about THAT. Either way, I'm freaked.
I don't believe I am finished shopping just yet, and I have to count the number for each kid and it has to be similar.. Like if I have 30 gifts for Ben and only 15 for Saria.. that's really noticeable so I will go and get Saria a few more things. I remember one year being soooo pissed off at my parents because I asked for a walkman (haha see how long ago it was) for Christmas and my sister (oh the nerve) opened one up and THAT WAS WHAT I WANTED, how dare you, so I don't wanna hear them whining all day about she/he got to open more than I did. Its also just more fair ;) I'll have to snag a few sister in laws for the day to help me finish this job because I still have to get Brad something and he just hates shopping anyway..
So anyway, it snowed here a few days ago. I didn't take the kids out in it because 1) it wasn't enough to build a snowman with, or much else for that matter, and 2) as usual, Saria is sick... But the kids were really excited about it, and I let Samuel go outside and grab a little snowball and play with it for a few minutes (sharing it with Ben)
Saria stayed home from school yesterday because she had no voice and she was coughing all over the place. She was really really disappointed at having to stay home but all day Sunday we told her to settle down and stop talking or she'd lose her voice and be coughing, but she didn't listen to us OF COURSE so she paid the price.
Anyway, she did manage to get to school this morning, so I hope she does alright. I have a few more presents to wrap...and nothing else to report!! I really need to get a new memory card/charge my batteries so I can take pictures. I'll put that on my to do list...
OH I am also making a little list of goodies I'm going to start making for the Christmas Eve family get together. ;) I have my favorite treats on there. Pigeon Poop, Puppy Chow, Peanut Butter Balls, and COOKIES of some sort.. (No baked? I'm sure Hila would like that ;0)

@ my new blog title

Ssbmommy is never in a great mood, it was typed there to help me remeber to try to be happy, but I've come to the conclusion that happiness is way overrated (as is sleep) and it appears that most of my blogging is under stress and chaos, so this title seems more fitting.
I started to write a novel here, but decided against it, I really need a journal for this sort of thing as I really do not want people to think I'm miss humbug 24/7. Actually, I am, but that's besides the point..
and just a little factoid: I thought of this title in the bathtub this morning. It was only quiet because the kids were watching Horton Hears a Who for the fifth time today and its' only 1 PM.

Fact: Polar bear is the best bear..

OH SHOVE IT. FACT really is that no matter how you try to sugar coat this lovely season, it's all a HORRIBLE experience. I won't even go into detail, I'll just name them one by one, and I honestly hope that no one else has a list this big.
1. First electric bill was 250 bucks, next month it's 377, and this month it's 390
2. oh wait, I guess that's really 1-3 there so I'll skip to 4
4. Toll infractions- a little detail to this one, Brad forgot his ATM card in the atm machine at the bank, went back to retrieve it and it was gone, so we had to call the bank and cancel that card and get new ones in our name. We had a good to go account which in the process went negative because of all the freaking accounts I had to switch over, I forgot about that one, sue me. So we get mails stating he's to either appear in court or pay a huge fine, and we call good to go and explain the situation to which they reply that it should be alright, we have since then used the new card to update the account and why in the world can't they just take the money out of the account that way to fix the problem. but NO they send us a new mail stating that there wasn't enough PROOF that our account was in good standing so the court/payment is still set, seriously, SCREW YOU WA STATE.
5. Our furnace's pilot light apparently broke so we were without heat for an entire day (because that Sunday it broke we were out of town)and it took them well into the next day after we called to come out and fix it.
6. Ben has been throwing himself onto the floor (bruising his head) in fits of rage as well as screaming more than usual, and Sam is no better trust me...
7. Mold.. yea, windows are still wet, carpeting is still wet, and my rent is still 1200 bucks..
8. Well this is good, I can't find anything else to be upset about...
How's YOUR Day?

New Haircut!!! and ONE hugeeeee Christmas Tree

No way!!! I actually spent money on myself?!?!?!? I know, it's crazy, but I wasn't alone so I guess its ok. Saria, Brad and I all got our hair cut at Super Cuts tonight, and I might like to add, I'm a very very very very plain jane kinda gal and so I have NO clue what I want when I get my hair cut, but the lady that cut my hair was great, and I am really happy with it. I think I look sexayyyyyy. (See I have some self esteem now, go hairs!!!, really, GOODBYE hair) My hair was donated (go me!!!) and I feel pretty freaking good ;) Love yas!!!
We got our Christmas tree at Lowes, we all thought it was way too big, but the size down was too small so of course we'll go with too big!!! We have to turn sideways to get into the house, but MEH ITS CHRISTMAS :) I love the tree, and had a ton of fun decorating (or rather ,handing ornaments to the kids) I have about 12 to replace back onto the tree because Benjamin keeps taking them off, but other than that.. nothing much has happened!!!

HAHA I fooled you.. twice

So ya, tonight we surprised Christina with a baby shower (the funeral home that Mom works at threw it for her) and we had to trick her by telling her that all the girls were going out to dinner. We had to go pick up Mom or she would never leave the office on time, which was the lie to get her to the Funeral Home, and the lies continued when we got there because we had to use the front door because the back door was "locked" for the night. Anyway, she had a really really great time, was super surprised and very very beautiful might I add, she got a lot of good things for the baby, a crib/mattress/changing table, a baby bath tub, lots of outfits and bottles and stuff, and a swing, diapers and some wipes. So after the baby shower she brings me home, and SOMEHOW they snuck in a cake with rainbow brite on it for ME (my birthday is tomorrow) and so we had a double dose of HAHA I fooled you tonight.. It's simply HILArious that ME, the one that created the lie about what we were doing tonight for Christina's shower ends up getting fooled too... I say HILArious to let you guys all know who was in charge of keeping her mouth shut. Boy she had TWO events to keep hush about, imagine how tough that was for her haha. She did great. It was hilarious that she drew a diagram for Brad to follow to arrange the candles around the picture of rainbow brite. And, even though I laugh at that, I realize just how much these awesome people love me, to think of RAINBOW candles, RAINBOW brite cake topper, RAINBOW chips in the icing, and stuffed with cherry filling which I love. I don't have pictures yet, but we all KNOW who does, and I'm sure she'll post more in detail about the day. I really had a good time and I am super glad I went. It was a blast, most of the fun we had (well in my opinion) was the girly gab we had on the way back to my house. Christina is absolutely glowing and makes a beautiful pregnant gal ;)



FAMILIES ARE THE BEST PRESENTS EVER. :)

^0^ Halloween^0^

Like my bats? So after the excitement of the Hilaween party that I KNOW Hila's blogged about already, we had a relaxing Halloween (ya right) in the witch (like my play on words here) we went to Saria's school carnival, let them play a few games, and took them down the "trick or treat street" they had there. Saria was absolutely excited about the school thing, but we only stayed there for about an hour, then we came home and waited for Hila, Mom, Christina, Nick, and Desiree to arrive so we could all go to the Trunk or Treat together at the church. That was a lot of fun! The kids' buckets filled quickly and they really had a good time. I was so proud of Samuel for walking up to this seriously scary guy, laughing, and saying "trick or treat." If it was me, I woulda run for the hills. Maybe he's not such a wuss after all. Anyway, after we went trunk or treating, Mom and Hila came back to the house and we watched the Garfield Halloween episode off the computer, and then we watched the Peanuts Halloween too. The kids laughed their butts off when POOR Charlie Brown says, "I got a rock." THEN Mom forced Brad to youtube a bunch of stuff including "They're Coming to Take Me Away AHAH" and something about ... "Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard" or something.. like that.. anyway, I'd never heard that one before and Brad straight out refused to look it up so mom had to take the computer over to get that one out of him. I'll have you know that after Hila and Mom left.. Brad SANG that song...Just wanted to let you know that.. he was sooooooo against playing it, buthe sang it afterwards. Then he tells me that it's because you get the most annoying one stuck in your head. Uh huh..sure ;P

Oh the joys of childhood

I caught Benna Booter flying to Africa or the Great Wall of China a few weeks ago, and thought I'd share the picture...

Canning the conference

Well not really, but I figured I'd go out and collect a few more grapes off my vines outside and remove them from their stems while I'm watching conference, thus getting them ready to be canned. So we learned a few things last night, about how jelly made here needs a set test because the recommended time is never long enough. I had NO problems getting my blackberry jelly to set using their directions, but for some I think grapes are just more picky. haha.. picky.. anyway.. I am a firm believer in if it's free, and helpful... you should use what Heavenly Father has given you. So if I'm greedy for picking every last FREE grape from the vine outside, I am supposed to be!!! So sometime this week I will probably be making grape jelly all by myself (maybe Brad can help, he's really good with that sort of thing) and hopefully this time it'll set better and taste just as good ;)
In other news, I'm excited to be watching the conference today. I really enjoyed the talks I actually heard yesterday. I am so thankful that I have family around that share my beliefs, values, etc. It makes life so much easier. I hate being away from my parents, or at least this far away.. but I am really honestly happy that we moved here. Beyond the fact that we have family nearby, I am in love with the area. I love my house (with its free grapes and blackberries) I love the view of the mountains, and I love it when it rains the way it rains here. Rarely does it storm, it's just a light mist most days and I love the way it sounds and makes the air smell.
Ok a time to be mushy is over, conference is about to start.. :)

Busy weekend

Well, at least Saturday was. We all got togehter (Hila, Christina, Mom and I) to can all sorts of things. Since they were running a little late, I started my blackberry jelly and finished that by the time they got there. Then we peeled a bunch of apples, cored them, and made apple butter and apple sauce. Smelled soooo good. Then we cleaned the grapes, and pressed them and made grape jelly! Then we made blueberry cobbler/pie filling. It took allll day but the smells were definetly worth it, not to mention the food storage we are now beginning to pile up. ;) I have to admit though, that I was overly exhausted Saturday and I didn't sleep at all Saturday night, so I went to half of sacrament and then asked Brad to bring me hom eand I took a nap with Ben. I still don't feel well, I really do not sleep well at all ever so it may take a few days to recover from.

SO much going on.. *sigh*

Really, I expect to be able to type a whole lot of stuff because I DID say that a lot of things were going on, but in all honesty, its nothing out of the ordinary or even worth blogging about. The weather has begun to get a little cooler which is bittersweet to me, mostly because we've only got electric heaters/space heaters to warm the house this year because we can not afford the heating oil. But we do have a ton of nice comfy blankets as well, and that certainly helps.
Hila, Mom and I canned peaches and peas on Saturday. It was a lot of fun, the kids only got in our way a few times, and generally they listened when we told them to go out of the kitchen. I love my kitchen, I just seriously wish there was a safety gate big enough to block the entry from the living room. I really enjoy doing those things, and with family makes it even better. I am no expert canner, but I'm getting there, hey I can read instructions.
We mowed some of our front yard yesterday, sadly the bees in the ground undug the dirt that Brad threw on there a few weeks ago in hopes that it would smother them and they'd die.. (so sad I know, but those things stung the mess out of me and I don't want them to do it to my kids as well). We could only get so far with the mower before the bees started swarming, and by that time we determined it was time to go inside. The last few blackberries were picked from the bushes, I gave Saria an absolutely HUGE one, was so proud of it honestly. I think I'm going to be canning some more jelly and maybe pie filling with that stuff, as soon as I figure out how to do the pie filling part..
Yesterday we also had to deflea the house yet again. I sent the boys upstairs while I put the carpet powder down and brushed it into the carpet. Brad sprayed the couch with some flea spray stuff, and so far today I haven't had a flea jump on me. Not that I honestly care if they eat me, it's Ben that I'm concerned about, the poor kid is absolutely covered in bites and it looks as though he has chicken pox which I know he doesn't..
SO yep, that about sums up my awesomeness for the past few days. I lead such an exciting life huh!

Ghost Busters-I need you

Ya, so it doesn't even matter what time I go to bed at night, or at which time I sleep in until.. I AM ALWAYS TIRED. I never get sleep when I lay down, in fact whenever I toss and turn in the middle of the night it's very very violent-so violent that I've punched/kicked my husband before. (I'm sure Hila's all like way to go Tarylyn at this point) I'm like the lightest sleeper ever (unless I'm really zonked) and I tend to wake up with the slightest of noises. Well last night I had a hallucination apparently, i still think I actually saw something. It was a man's figure (we were in bed Brad was asleep and I was trying to be apparently) I honestly thought it was Brad, just LEAPT over our bed and landed where Brad's sleeping. Leaping over a King size bed as gracefully as that thing did was impossible, but I freaked out and said SOMETHING to Brad, and I'm sure I sounded sorta freaking crazy...I believe I said something like "I just saw you jump over the bed" and apparently he doesn't remember this, because I just called him and he has absolutely no idea what I'm talking about, but he suggested in a jest that he was having an out of body experience, and I replied with "ya, you're smart because whatever you were doing, you KNEW the exact moment I'd open my eyes and returned to your body." So anyway, ya I'm a little freaked out because I feel like I'm going insane, and I know I'm absolutely healthy in the brain department so I'm convinced that what I saw was real and that's freaking me out more. Maybe next time he'll let me go with him.. haha

Saria's first day of school

So yesterday was Saria's first day of school, and while I did take pictures, I forgot to post them so I'm doing that now. She had a wonderful day, and she bought home a bunch of dot to dot and coloring pages that she did, and she did a wonderful job on them! I really think she just wasn't ready for 1st grade last year, and I think she'll do better this year.

I also made jelly yesterday, and Brad helped me with that. I don't think I will be using the powdered pectin anymore I really don't like it because for me it doesn't mix well. But the jelly did set this time, so I'm happy about that. :) I have two more full buckets of berries still so I am sure I will be making more sometime soon.

WOOT!!

I lost 5 lbs so far, yay me!

Sorry!! for my absence ;)

Ok, so I've not posted in a few days, and my mom has gone back home, and a lot of what we did went into the abyss of forgotten memories (I know it just happened right!!)And things have been a little hectic getting back to normal, so I really don't have much to say. We did go to dinner with everyone Tuesday evening @ Shari's, which was crazyyyy. My mom, stepdad, Ben and his wife and their 3 kids, Christina and Nick and Desiree, Mom and Dad, Grandma and Grandpa and my brood too. We all had a very good time together. I don't have any pictures of that night, and I still haven't put my pictures on photobucket (Procrastinate much?)But I will get to it eventually, I promise.. ;) As for other things, I've been picking the mess out of blackberry bushes around my yard, I have a huge container full of juice (which I froze because I don't feel like doing anything with it just yet) and I have a HUGE bowl (2 actually) full of berries that I have frozen waiting to be turned into something awesome like jelly or a pie or maybe a smoothie...But ya, I've been outside cutting bushes away to get to the good berries because they're about to go to waste if I don't. It kinda drives Brad crazy because he thinks we have enough berries saved up and that I don't need anymore, but I keep picking more and more and tell him that you can never have enough. I mean it's free goodies right, grows naturally in my yard, I should take what I can and do what I can with it. ;) So the kids wanting to play outside gives me an excuse to get out there and pick them.. Tomorrow I am probably going to make some jelly. The first two times I did mom helped me, so this will be interesting.. doing it by myself for the first time.

I am also kinda determined to lose some weight now, and I have been taking walks and trying to stay away from certain foods etc. It's a lot easier to get fat than to lose weight lemme tell you. I just want to be able to run around and enjoy playing with my kids without dying of shortness of breath etc, and I do reaize that I am unhealthy in the amount of weight I have gained, and so I am going to strive to become more active and healthy!! I was promised a new wardrobe when I successfully complete my mission, and the sound of new clothes is just soo great to me since I have been wearing the same clothes that I did in high school...graduated 7 years ago so, ya I need some new clothes.
As far as anything else goes, Saria starts school on the 3rd so I will be a little more free during the day, just the two boys to look after, and I can take a long walk after I get her on the bus because I have a double stroller, or better yet if Brad's home he can watch them while I go walking. I am pretty excited about life right now, it's good to me, and I'm thankful for it. I am super excited that Hila moved up here, I may have someone to go walking with now! :) And I'm sure she's got a few awesome healthy recipes up her sleeve as well. Well, I will definetly try to get some pictures up soon, I hope everyone is safe and remains that way. Love to all!!

Zoo and Pike's Market

So two days ago we went to the Point Defiance Zoo for a few hours, the kids of course had a blast, Ben loved the sharks the most I think. Samuel really enjoyed the effalants (elephants) and I think Saria's favoriate was the parrot she got to feed a dollar to (it dropped her dollar in a donation box (real bird too) We made jelly yesterday, but it won't set, and I think the reason is because we put too much sugar in, I guess we read the instructions wrong, oh well, maybe I will be able to pick enough berries to do it again. I have been trying to add pictures to my myspace page. After I get them up over there, I will put a few of them here. We went to the Pike's Place Market and walked around there yesterday afternoon. My mom said she could walk around that thing for hours, it really is a neat experience. The kids trid some chocolate spaghetti! Today we went to Illahee again for a little bit, and we walked up and down the nature trails they have, and picked shells and the park ranger gave each of the kids a sticker.

Nonna and Poppy visit day 2

Well, yesterday my mom and step dad got here around 11 30 in the morning, and we didn't really do a whole lot because everyone was really tired. Ok I lied, we did a lot considering the circumstances. We went to the beach for a little bit and walked on the pier, but we didn't stay there too long because the tide was in and the whole shore part was in the water. Then we went home and of course it's raining, but we pick blackberries anyway. I squashed those suckers to make juice for the jelly I'm going to make while my mom is here too. They're still draining. That was yesterday....
Today we went to the Pacific Science Center in Seattle. It's really expensive to get in, but let me tell you, the kids had such a wonderful time, and so did the adults, and we all agree that it was money absolutely well spent. They had so many fun and exciting hands on exhibits for all ages, Benjamin even got in on the action. I think Samuel's favoriate part of the whole trip was this beach ball that was floating above a tube that was shooting out air, and you could move the tube back and forth to change the angle the ball was floating at, he kept trying to take it off the air (it was just out of his reach) and sometimes he actually knocked it off the air steam and it would fly and hit me in the head, and it was so hilarious because when I threw it back to him he thought that he was going to catch it but the air stream caught it first and blew it right back up out of his reach. Saria's favoriate part was the lazer light show that we went to, it was called "The 80's." My mom and I both agreed that the songs they chose to represent the show really sucked hehe. Brad really enjoyed the view of the beehive they have set up in there, because it had a tube leading outside where the bees can come in and out at. I really loved the shadow wall, the room where you stand against the wall and it leaves an imprint of your shadow on the wall. I think everyone enjoyed the butterfly exhibit too, my kids absolutely love them. I found in the gift store a butterfly hanging that had several species of butterflies on it, and one of them was called "The common Mormon" I told him if I could find a print with just that butterfly in it I'd wanna buy it, but I didn't find one. I thought it was mildly amusing hehe. I will have to put up pictures just as soon as I snag them from my mother's memory card because I do not have the time to take pictures while chasing my kids around.. hehehe More to come as we've still gotta visit the zoo and aquarium and other things before they leave.

BoM challenge for the Silverdale Ward youth

It's been a pretty awesome experience so far. We are reading the BoM daily anyway, so instead of starting with the beginning, we are just starting with where we were reading as a family and we'll get it done backwards ;) Saria has been asked to read the entire BoM by the end of the year and highlight references of God (The Lord, Christ, etc) red, and where it is Christ's spoken words, highlight in blue. This is words that He not only spoke to prophets, but the relay of messages from the prophets to the people. I have learned a lot in doing this, not just spiritually but that would be a good place to start. I never really LOOKED for these things in the scriptures before, and its amazing just how often the Lord is referred to and it's just as amazing when I recognize His spoken word. Saria is really enjoying this project and has even participated in reading the verses with us. I know she can't possibly understand what she reads, because half the time I don't, but she can read these really BIG words that a typical 7 year old wouldn't really be able to do. I think it has a lot to do with the fact that we do read scriptures and they are full of these big words, but it just amazes me everytime she flies through a verse.

Its been 7 years today :)

Since I entered the waters of baptism and became a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. It's a good feeling, really. I sit back and look at ALL the experiences I've had, both good and bad, and I realize that without the guidance of the church influence (even if sometimes I made the absolute worst decision possible) I would probably NOT be where I am today. I have a LOT to learn still, but the things I have gained along the way have been so helpful and rewarding. The biggest thing being that we recently went to the temple for the first time and were sealed together as a family. It is probably one of the greatest experiences I've ever had and I know that if we weren't doing what we are supposed to be doing that it wouldn't have happened. I think I really realized how important the gospel is when Brad went to Turkey in 2006. I started to read the Work and the Glory series and even though most of it was fiction, it was written (for me at least) in such a way that I was actually THERE. I couldn't put the books down. And reading what they went through, their hardships and their togetherness just made me think that my problems were dinky and I should be grateful that it wasn't something major. I think right then I realized that we weren't living the way we needed to be living, and I discussed my feelings on the matter with Brad and he (in my opinion at least) seemed to be waiting for me to say this to him because he felt the same way. We got rid of all our R rated movies that we had on DVD in a yard sale, and we started paying tithing and we talked with the Bishop about things and we just got on track, and I'm very proud of where we are right now, even if it took 7 years to do. I just wanted to share this with you, I know I already did in my temple trip post but a little reminder never hurt ;0

Oh deer, Oh deer, Oh deer!!

So the other day I was talking to my mom about these deer that love to walk around our house all the time, and about how this year they had two babies walking with them, and she said "oh you should take pictures of them" and I'm like, "Well I bet they're grown up by now because it's been a while since I last saw them," and what do you know, the very next day Brad spots the mom, and right behind her is her babies walking around the house eating the trees/leaves/bushes along the way.



you will have to click on them because the whole picture didn't show up there, but clicking is easy :P

FHE is so fun :)

So tonight, we got some rocks, washed them off, and painted them for FHE. We really didn't have a lesson planned, just a family outing, but it's amazing how sometimes, things just happen!! We planned to color these rocks for a good week or more, it was just a thought that popped into my head one day, to paint them and add them to a flower garden eventually. And, what do you know, this week we've been reading about the Jaredites and the boats they had to build and how they needed light on those boats, and how God touched the stones and made them bright so they could use them on their journey. The kids had a blast, and so did Brad, he's so artistic, I keep hoping that one day he'll sweep me off my feet with a drawing but he refuses everytime I ask. It's nice though that he can be artistic at times when not asked, I guess maybe he just feels intimidated when I ask him to draw me something. :) Anyway, we had a blast, and I put some photos up at photobucket.com, so click on the couple I post here and it'll take you to them I hope.

Saria and Samuel

I hadn't taken pictures in forever, mostly because my camera batteries are dead, but I managed to take two before they stopped working entirely..I cut her hair to her shoulders, it's a little crooked but of course it'll grow back ;)

Well this certainly doesn't help

Why...when I dream is it always either about the same ex boyfriend (the one from like 13 years ago haha) or me being pregnant...Honestly, I'd rather have a nightmare where I'm being murdered and torn limb from limb or swimming in a sea of fish (always hated that) because at least then when I wake up, I feel better...I honestly don't obsess over this child bearing issue, really, and I don't dream of being pregnant every night, really really, but last nights dream sucked. And I know this whole issue is affecting my relationship with Brad too. And I know no one wants to hear about our romantic life, but lemme just give you an idea...and it has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that most nights two of our three kids sleep in our room either...(wow I can't think of a comparison so I'll just come right out and say it) It sucks...it doesn't exist in any form, I do not just mean sexually, I mean...ANYTHING. As a matter of fact, and this is a sad thing, very very sad thing, the other day Brad kissed me on the lips out of the blue (about as romantic as it gets now) and Ben the two year old? ya him.. went up to Brad and gave him a kiss and told him byeeee be careful because he thought he was going to work. This is serious stuff people...When a 2 year old associates his father kissing his mother as going bye bye to work...If we had medical iinsurance I'd go to a doctor and figure out ways to get over this because I really feel like it's hurting my relationship with Brad. Honestly, that's the last thing I want to do...Maybe I need to stop remembering the past and try to enjoy the now...that sounds like a good idea...or maybe, when I do remember the past, I should make it feel now how good it felt then. Maybe I need to stop wallowing in self pity and realize that as incomplete as I feel, the children that I have need me, and so does my husband, and maybe instead of being depressed about stuff I should just be there for them. Easier said then done...but I can try. :)

Finding things I thought were lost forever

So I don't know what was going through my head when I put receiving blankets as old as Saria in a box labeled artwork, or why it took us a year to find that box, open it up and find not only those but an assortment of lame artwork from our high school days, shelves to hang, puzzles that have been glued, a pop up laundry hamper, and our state coin holder. But, of course those receiving blankets just set off memories in my head like fourth of July fireworks and I had to just stand back and stop looking at them. You know, somedays I am so extremely happy that I had my tubes tied, but most others I sit here wishing I hadn't. I know I have three kids, and I know I've talked about this before, but obviously it's bugging me again, I know I have three kids, and I am lucky to have those but I really do feel so incomplete. Maybe it has a lot to do with everyone else deciding for me that it was best to have my tubes tied in the first place. Granted I don' t think that I could live through another pregnancy, but the thought that it's impossible to even have a chance just really depresses me. I actually (and I'm being honest here) have never liked kids! I never liked kids growing up, I always felt very uncomfortable around them, even now when they're not mine I do feel a little uneasy, but I so enjoy my own, and I am so thankful that I have them. I worried about the stupidest things in high school sometimes... I remembered how I used to worry about the world ending before I had the chance to become a parent...(silly isn't it) I know Brad is content with our family, and to an extent, so am I really, I mean I really am, I just... like I said, I feel so incomplete sometimes. If I could do things over, I would have never listened to anyone that encouraged me to have my tubes tied. Because seriously, after two and a half years passing I shouldn't still be depressed about it. Anyway, maybe I'll wash the blankets and use the material to make another blanket for Ben or something...

Just an update

Sorry I haven't updated in forever, I have been battling fleas, children, and lawn mowers for the past few weeks. First off, fleas...somehow our house has become infested with these jerks and it got bad, Ben started scratching to the point where he was making himself bleed on the back of his neck and legs, so we got a flea coller, some control or something to put on the cat, and we treated the cat on a Saturday afternoon. The next day we planned to bomb the house while we were at church but when we woke up and I came out to sort laundry, about nineteen of them jumped on me, that's when I realized that if Ben was getting bit as badly as he was and having no other signs of them on anyone else, I knew if he stayed in the house he'd get eaten alive so we took the kids out immediately go them dressed, bombed the house and went to the beach. We couldn't get back into the house in time before church started so we missed it. That really didn't kill them, though at first it appeared that it had worked, and maybe it did, but we had another infestation not to long after that so we got carpet powder to kill the fleas and we brushed it into the carpet with brooms, let it sit overnight, and we have almost got the problem under control now. We tried everything though, spent a lot of money too. We had dishes of vinegar put onto the floor that the kids put the fleas they find in, it kills them right away, sometimes they even jump into the dish without us putting them in there. We also rented a steam cleaned and cleaned all the carpets before we put the carpet powder down, I hope that helped too because it cost a lot of money to do. We also shaved our cat, she looks rather stupid now but hopefully it'll grow back haha.
Secondly, the lawn mower...oh boy, we just bought this thing like three months ago and it already crapped out on us. It starts, and after a few minutes just completely stops, then you have to prime it about ten times before you get it started again, and it goes for a few minutes and dies all over again. We still haven't fixed it, the weeds are overgrown, the kids can't really play outside because of them so that leads to the third thing...I have been miserable having to be inside with these kids for the past week because Brad's basically been working straight through days, comes home to sleep and that's about it...And since I can't fix the lawn mower, I use it and restart it every five minutes or less and it is just more strain then I need. I told Brad this morning to take the kids to church I was staying home, I need a break. It feels good to not hear them screaming and yelling at each other. I wish I could say I missed them horribly, but I'd be lying through my teeth. And what a way for Brad to realize (and maybe appreciate) what I do. Sorry I sound bitter, but I am!! :) I'll get over it.

Bradamus Jones

*Insert Indiana Jones theme Here*

are you ready for it?

SO much work!!

My goodness this yard is huge. I mean, I've honestly never ever seen a yard this huge before. I thought the house in Dothan had a big yard but WOW!!!!!! Haha. I need to take pictures. I should have taken pictures before we started this project we're doing.. man...I better do it soon so that you can see the before/after. Ok, let me just say..this yard...is huge....And it's very overgrown. There's land around the Huge Yard but it's so overgrown with weeds/shrubs/etc that you really can't do anything without bulldozing the mess out of it, and we can't afford that, and it's not technically our house, so we are just dealing with the greenery around the house and in the part of the Huge Yard that we can access with a mower/weeder. For some reason these people really LOVE these UGLY bushes. They are LINING every flower bed and sidewalk surrounding our house. I hate them. Brad hates them. Enter the chainsaw. Yep, Brad's now a lumber jack, man I think he looks sexy holding that thing with them AWESOME goggles on. And I am now the proud owner of a hedge trimmer...looks like an electric knife only tons bigger ;) and it's for hedges not meat... ;) My toy requires 24 hour battery charging, however, so I have not seen it in action as of yet. I did however get out with my little hedge trimmers and manually trim a few of these UGLY bushes (the ones we are deciding to let live because it creates a wall around the property and on the other side of this wall is a rather large drop off) We ALMOST literally live in the woods by the way. I mean, just the other day a momma and two baby deer circled around the house. They were absolutely beautiful. Anyway, my point is, we've been outside a lot lately, cutting these ugly bushes and pruning the ones that we're keeping, and the kids have been having a blast being outdoors and running around. I will have to post pics of it soon :)

Samuel's birthday party

Mom came over a little after five and we started opening presents and then for about an hour everyone was playing with the new toys!! Samuel just loved the hooded towel he got from his Nonna. He also loves his remote control Lightening McQueen he got from his Grandma, but I don't think he likes it as much as Ben does. Ben even figured out how to make it go by pushing the button!! he got a ton of matchbox cars, which hs absolutely loves, his favorite is the Shark one that Christina, Nick, and Desiree got for him. After Christina and Desiree got there (she had gotten in trouble and was taking a nap so they came later) we had cake and icecream. It was a very exhausting day for the grown ups and everyone left very tired. I am just glad that the kids had a good time!!

An update on the Scatmonster

because we just learn so much from Samuel when we're all laying in bed for a nap. Today we learned the scat monster is Spanish. Yep, that's right, he's Spanish. Why? because Sam said so that's why. Also...I explained to him that scat is poop (at least according to one episode of CSI in describing animal feces) and he then informed me that it's "bloody skeleton poop" and I think Brad and I both understood him FINALLY (sorta like the rucky story) and we think hes' trying to say skeleton monster, but scat monster sounds so much more appealing am I right? ;)

The Scatmonster, a fedora, and a vacuum cleaner

What the heck is she talking about you might ask? WELL. The SCAT monster is who Samuel claims is scaring him in his room (which is why he sleeps on the floor in our room half the time. ok more than half the time...) But more recently, this monster seems to be following him around causing him trouble. For example it : used de-solve-it on my breakfast bar stool, went into a desk drawer with sharp scissors in them (which ended up on the floor) while I was taking a shower, and played with the carpet cleaning powder on the countertop while I was using the vacuum (which is part of my title!!) Anyway, we need to find a monster removal company really swiftly because this monster LOVES to get Samuel in deeeeeeeeep doo-doo.

Ok, my next wonderful topic is this Fedora. Brad's on an Indiana Jones kick, in fact ALL three of my kids can HUM the tune..we all know what I'm talking about...anyway, it being our Anniversary and Father's Day right around the corner, I figured I'd knock them both out and save a little money (haha) so I allowed him to purchase one of these nifty hats off their website. I assured him he would NEVER look as sexy as Harrison Ford, but maybe further down the road I'd get him a whip and he could further his obsession and fit the part better. I just have to say, that you should have seen him measuring his head with the tape measure (not the sewing kind, you know the metal kind that bends that carpenters and electricians and handymen use) HAHAHAHAHAHAAHA, Hila woulda died laughing...I almost did, glad I lived to tell this tale.. hahaha, I'm dying as I type this... anyway
THE VACUUM is my new present!!! It looks pretty much like my old one, only it works.. haha and it is this metalic green color that almost matches my carpet. That's my anniversary present. I would just love to add, that I guess it's clear who has grown up in this house ;) Though I have to admit, if I didn't think he'd look absolutely stunning in this fedora I would never have agreed to it. I will make him wear it everywhere, you betcha (as long as I'm not with him that is) and I am sure he will be hummed at a lot. Especially when I get the whip to match. :)

Samuel is 4 !!

I really have had an exciting four years with this little guy. He started off kinda bad...I wanted to kill him everytime he opened his mouth for a few months, but thankfully colic doesn't last long and, not to mention everytime he smiled all bad feelings disappeared. He keeps me on my toes and teaches me so much everyday. He's the most serious kid I have, it's sooo hard to not laugh at him sometimes. He's my little camel and I think he's just the cutest thing ever. He does, after all, look exactly like his daddy. I love you Samuel, and I hope you have a good birthday!!!


of all the pictures I have of Samuel...I have to say, this is my absolute favorite ;)

Rachel Ray for the day

YAY!! Due to the fact that Brad had to spend the ENTIRE day working (from about ooo 10 until well.. he hasn't come home yet, but he has another job at 8, so it won't be until LATE tonight) and my lack of energy (they should can that stuff) the chicken that was meant for grilling on the BBQ got cut up and made into chicken nuggets! (WHICH might I add are very awesome and a big thumbs up from ALL the kiddos) But that's not the best part. I realized how I could be lazy and have a FHE while preparing dinner, so I sat all three kids on the big stools we have against our breakfast bar and proceeded to explain step by step what I was doing, and I even had them stir and mix things for me. Ahhh it felt good to be Rachel Ray for the day, although I am not nearly as skinny or pretty, I know my kids appreciated the time I took to explain everything to them!! AND I knocked out an ABSOLUTELY quiet, attention filled FHE to boot!! HAH!!!!!! Gosh I'm so awesome I surprise myself sometimes ;) ;) :) :)

This sucks!!!! or not...

OK so for the past two days I've been trying to vacuum my floor because with three kids it can get kinda dirty quick, but my vacuum hasn't been sucking up anything. So (having had one vacuum already blow up and die on me scaring the daylights out of my children and myself) I make Brad look at it. The little part that gets all the hair stuck around it (I don't know what it's called but I'm sure my description will be sufficient to let you know what I'm talking about) isn't spinning, or it spins maybe once and then stops. So we take the thing apart, and check the belt which is fine, there's nothing wrong with it. So we're both under the assumption that it's time to buy another vacuum (this is only two years old, I've had good times with this vacuum, how am I supposed to just replace it!) *sigh* oh the woes...

There were three in the bed and the BIGGEST one said GET OUT

OK so maybe I haven't exactly said get out, but it's getting to the point where I just may!! I have no problem sleeping with Benjamin in the bed, but Brad does, he doesn't get any sleep with him and he sleeps in weird positions that end up making him really achy and grumpy (and we can't have that!) So I think we're going to work on getting him out of our room...I know I've said this before so I'm giggling right now.. haha But seriously, he really needs to use his own bed. Not to mention...so does Samuel (who right now sleeps on our floor) I guess that loft room is scary. Anyway, maybe they'll start taking naps upstairs together in their own beds and we'll go from there. Either that, or save money for a California King ;)

Supposed to be at church but...

But SSB are being total hemorrhoids today. Not to mention we're watching Desiree who is just as bad, if not worse than the other three. We made it through the first ten minutes, oh wait, nevermind.. we were in the hallway before sacrament was even passed...I took Ben out because he was getting sleepy and didn't want to sit down (mind you he's the best behaved one of all of them, odd since he's the TWO YEAR OLD), so anyway, I take Ben out and five minutes later (if even that) Brad comes out with the rest of them and the diaper bags. Apparently Saria got on her knees on the pew and totally turned around and was not sitting correctly on the pew, and Desiree had to join in. (This being after I took the hymnal from Desiree after telling her repeatedly not to bend and be forceful with the pages). So thankfully no one else's children are being bad yet, since sacrament hasn't even been blessed or passed it's fairly early on, we have an entire couch to ourselves where we put one child on each cushion (Ben's in my arms on a chair across from the couch) They have a nice big time out together, in which LO AND BEHOLD they get into more trouble (they've all been to church before and know how to act) so Brad has to sit between Sam and Desiree. I take Ben's shoes and socks off because for some reason he hates shoes on his feet for too long, and I figured it would help him fall asleep. I guess Desiree thinks it's ok to take her shoes off because she takes them off (no problem really just put them back on right) and we tell her about six times between the both of us to put them back on and she just stares at us like she absolutely knows what we're telling her to do but refusing to at the same time so we just say "ok that's it, lets go" and that's when she starts putting her shoes on...sooo needless to say, we left a little bit early, HEY at least we got to partake of sacrament. As for watching Desiree on a SUNDAY ever again, nope, ain't going to happen ever, I will gladly watch her any other day but SUNDAY because I actually enjoy being at church and would love to be able to stay the entire time. Maybe when Saria starts helping me out by distracting her brothers into doing something that won't get them into trouble instead of being a ring leader and getting them into worse trouble... then I'll reconsider, but my patience is kinda...well we'll just say they're getting on my dendrites...I know, I'm a mother, I chose to have these three wonderful spirits (which I do love with all my heart and am very glad they're here) however, there's only so much I can take, being that I am human and just an average everyday one at that. When parenting brings you to tears, because no matter what you try, or what you DO doesn't seem to work, when everything you do makes you look like a bad parent...when you just wanna throw in the towel...ya, there's only so much I can take. I know they're just kids, and I think that's the ONE thing that helps me not lose it completely. But there's a certain level of responsibility that Saria should be displaying by now, that she isn't. It's so hard to deal with a child like this...because I really don't know what to do. I think I've tried just about everything to try. But I'm sure there's something out there that can help. Maybe...I just need a chill pill ;) Or a nice Alaskan cruise...ya that sounds good

(Insert Indiana Jones theme here)

So we went to the movies yesterday (thanks to the awesome babysitting powers of MOM yay) and I will just come out right now and say, my goodness movie prices are steep!! But anyway, we get this huge popcorn and Brad, for some reason, insists on getting two huge drinks (says so we don't have to keep coming back out for refills.) I really enjoyed the movie! Lets face it, Shia LaBeouf + Harrison Ford=5 stars auto win from me. (hehe) But really, I thought the movie was a lot better then those nasty critics claimed it was, of course I really haven't disliked any movies ever unless their ending was absolutely stupid. Brad and I have even dubbed these kind of movies "the ninth gate kinda movies" (because that ending was absolutely stupid to us) (I am not even sure that movie wasn't rated R since that was way back in the day before we stopped watching R movies so if it was rated R no one will know what we're talking about.. but ya, definetly a good movie, I'd recommend it to anyone that can afford that 13.50 per person (I think that's what it was!)

Brad's new toy

So yesterday Brad went out and bought a truck!! We desperately needed two vehicles so that we would no longer miss church on Sundays because he had to work. He got a 2001 Ford Ranger, really nice little thing (its silver like my van woot! woot!) HOPEFULLY having two vehicles will lighten the burden on the van because it was insane driving that thing all over the state and then having to drive it all over the town too! This will help an amazing amount with being able to attend special events at school with Saria (and maybe help her socially) so we're all pretty excited and happy that we were able to get another vehicle.

When it rains.....

Ok so today we get another phone call from the school, same thing...wouldn't follow directions and was screaming at the top of her lungs. Only..tomorrow she has to stay home from school because the principal thinks she'll just do it again tomorrow. One of the things I noticed today is she does a lot of this crap because she wants to be the center of attention, and really the only thing she cares about is getting that attention, so we've been ignoring her a lot which really makes her angry!! but eventually she stops the whining. As I was discussing with her her actions and behaviors, she came off to me as being proud of herself and she thought she was cute and funny. So...I have no clue what we're going to do, I do know that my mind is made up nice and firm about her repeating first grade, so she will definately be doing that. As for everything else..well we can only pray things will get better!

For every good day....

So today we get a phone call from Saria's school principal stating that Saria's refusing to obey her teacher's instructions and that this is the second time today she's been in the office (it's MAYBE 10:00) and that she's not following instructions in the office either, and that if she doesn't stop and get herself together we'd have to come pick her up...I guess she got herself together for an hour because around 11:30 we got another phone call asking us to go pick her up. I didn't go because I stayed with the boys, but Brad told me she was sitting in a chair in the office screaming at the top of her lungs that she wanted a second chance and that she wants to stay in school..this followed by the office workers trying to stand her up so she could walk out of there and her reacting by turning into what Brad calls a "wet noodle" so Brad picked her up all the while she's screaming she doesn't want to go home and she basically throws this fit home...We made her sit on her bed and "think" about what she's been doing, making bad choices and she ended up falling asleep before too long. I think because she didn't listen to us last night, when we sent her to bed....that she was just overtired today...that is not an excuse, oh I believe she's got a lot more wrong with her then that, but that could explain at least some of her behavior...The thing no one here gets is what triggers her behavior, she's like night and day sometimes...and NO ONE can pin point anything that causes it...

What a beautiful day!!

Yesterday we decided to have a Family Day and so we went to Wal-Mart to try to find the kids a little pool to swim in, weren't successful there so we decided to try Fred Meyer and found a cute little whale pool with a slide. We also passed the grill isle, and we had a brilliant idea to grill out as the kids swam so we purchased a charcoal grill and these neat new round thingys that help light your charcoal (don't even need lighter fluid!!). The kids had a blast, even Benjamin was super excited, and threw the biggest fit about having to go back inside. The weather here is absolutely georgous!!
Oh, and before I forget these adorable pictures...Friday evening Ben fell asleep while watching the G.I. Joe movie (I woulda done the same thing honestly) but he was so cute where he fell asleep I just had to take pictures..

Ben's Haircut and Owwie

So a week ago this past Sunday we all decided to venture outdoors because it was nice and sunny and Ben climbed the stairs on the front porch to yell at the "kee" (kitty) in the window and when he was climbing back down the stairs he fell on his head in so many places!! First of all, his forehead had a pretty big cut in it, and it was dripping blood pretty badly so I pressed my hand against his forehead and ran inside with him. I then wiped his face with a wet washcloth as I applied pressure with it to the cut and the bleeding stopped to the point where I could release the washcloth without it dripping more. Then I cleaned him up a little more because he had blood everywhere.. in his eyes, around his nose etc, and I noticed he had a line straight across his face from the corner of the stair, so the poor kid's sensitive nose was even hurt. I had just given him a haircut either that day or the day before too.. He's healing well! Brad went out and got him some foaming antiseptic anti bacterial stuff and liquid band-aids and butterfly bandages and gauze AND baby tylonel so we doctored him up! He still has a cut on his head, but the other scratches have healed up!!

Happy Mother's Day

If that title fits ya ;)

Saria's Birthday

Okie, so it was almost a week ago, sorry!! We celebrated Saria's birthday on Saturday April 26th. We were the only ones that celebrated with her, so it's not something extravagant and awesome, but she had a good time. She loves Enchanted so Brad got her a disney Enchanted cake. She got several gifts from my mother which made it cheaper for us! We took her to Chuck E. Cheese later that night, don't have pictures from there, silly camera died, but she had a blast playing a game of miniature basketball (throwing the balls in the hoop) her and Samuel both were so excited when they scored points. She had a really fun day and a couple of good school days this week, but she did get in trouble and get written up on the bus... we're still working on that part..

Stroll down memory lane

I took out the kids' scrapbooks today (I haven't worked on them in two years and I am in a funk about doing it anytime soon..) and we sorta looked through them for an attempt at family home evening (which is more successful then most.) Ben pointed at everything (mostly the diecuts and stickers) and they were all really excited to see what they looked like as babies. I'm very thankful that I have those three...I got very sick everytime I was pregnant, but I wanted these kids so badly!! I look back at the trial I had of being pregnant and laugh to myself because that was the easy part!! They're a lot of work, and I'm glad that I can sit back and watch them grow and learn, and help them grow and learn too!! A lot of times I regret getting my tubes tied because I just really want FOUR (Brad has a brother and two sisters and lo and behold I have two sisters and a brother as well) so four just seems very natural to me... But really, I have my hands full with these three and am just so blessed to be alive to see them. They all looked so different as babies too!! That was another thing I was seeing. Samuel looked totally different from Saria and Benjamin. They're all absolutely georgous though ;)

YAY for potty training

I am not even doing it!! Ben has started taking his diapers off in the morning and throwing them in the trash (I think it's because Samuel does this and he's just copying Samuel) BUT, a lot of it is HIM, because he also takes off diapers (if he can) when he pees in them ONCE, and throws them in the trash and claps and says "yay!" I think it's a great thing, considering I haven't really even started potty training him yet, he's figuring it out on his own!! Brad doesn't seem to like the idea...spanked him several times on the butt for taking his diaper off, says it's "a waste of a diaper" and while that may almost be true I will never spank him for doing that because I KNOW that it's because he's learning. When I told Brad what he was doing, he told me to "shut the freak up." I wish sometimes he'd look at the big picture, see the things the kids do that's positive for a change...and not be so hard on them...I'm sure he wishes I'd be harder on them, but I believe that he's just a little too hard on them and needs to lighten up... He slept on the couch on his own last night...and while this is really no one's business and I probably shouldn't even post this...I'm really getting tired of it and kinda wish I had a friend to talk to..

My throat hurts!

WHY do I always get the crud LAST OF ALL and the worst? UGH this sucks!! My throat hurts, not to mention I feel like my head weighs 100lbs and at the same time can float away like a balloon at any moment. On another note, it is quite warm here today, in fact...I can't stay outside for more then ten minutes it's that warm!! I love it!!! We played outside, the kids did at least, Brad and I tried to do some yard work, but this yard is freaking huge so we didn't get very far!! We DID, however, find not one but TWO eggs from Easter haha.. I guess we DID hide a few after all.. I wonder how many more we will find, and when....

Saria's sick :(

OK so...EVERYTIME Saria has a fever she ends up either throwing up, or coming really close to it. Tonight so far she's only come close, but it scares the mess out of her everytime it happens. I think that because she was premature this happens because it doesn't happen with the boys, but always does with Saria. She's had a cold for the past few days which we've been giving her medicine for Pedicare something or other, but when she gets the fever part she just looks sooo bad. Her eyes start to look really glossy and kinda reddish and her cheeks turn bright red. I put a cool washcloth on her head and flip it every so often and basically tell her to go to bed because I know if she plays around it'll get worse and she'll end up throwing up and what kid wants to do that...so now she's asleep finally!! It's ONLY 11:32, I mean COME ON!! :)
Ben fell asleep tonight on his own, we were playing on the computers and I look over, and he's sitting there with his butt in the air and his "lovie" blanket underneathhim and he's passed out. This is different because he usually comes and sorta hits us and yells at us when he's tired. I thought he looked incredibly cute with his butt in the air!! Wish I took a picture.. Sam also fell asleep different tonight, hes' got his little stuffed "rucky" hippo with him, and he looks sorta like he's sitting up on the couch.. hehe OK, I am going to bed!!

BIG improvement!

Since starting the children's sonkbook cd on the computer Tuesday Saria has NOT been to the office!! She also has only had ONE five minute time out since then, and NO time outs today!! She is having a much better time, she listens to her teacher and is not whining!!! This is awesome! It's hard to pinpoint exactly what the problem is, but I think it has a lot to do with the fact that Saria relies on her surroundings and other people's emotions to dictate how she feels. So if we're happy, and the environment is happy she'll be happy...which is just about OBVIOUS but I didn't realize how MUCH these things impacted her, until the teacher sent sucha lovely email to me and told me the good news. AHH Behold the POWER of the Gospel! She loves listening to the songs, and got upset this morning, in fact, when I skipped one of the songs she enjoys, so I had to go back to it. Keep ya posted of course!!

Looks like free/low cost healthcare!

Well Saria comes home from school today with an envelope containing a form for free/low cost healthcare from her school's learning specialist. I was just gazing over it, and noticed that in a family of five, the max income for a month is 5080 dollars, and I just started giggling!! That's insane!! Brad has a really good paying job, and I even factored in his reserve pay, and TOPS total is about 4.5 k a month if that! Of course, I was basing THAT on if he's got serious overtime, so it appears as though we will have healthcare for the kids very soon! Then his insurance only has to worry about him and me.. I literally am still baffled over how we can afford our bills/rent sometimes, but we always have money left over for food etc, (I KNOW it's from paying tithing!!) I dunno, just wanted to share my news, I think it's good! OHHHH
This morning I woke Saria up with a kiss, I had the cd of the children's songbook (one about choosing the right etc) playing in the computer closest to the dinner table and I TALKED to Saria as she got dressed and ready for school and she seemed to be in a different and totally happy mood, which is usually NOT what happens in the morning with Saria, and she comes home today and she tells me she had a GOOD day, so maybe these positive influences and little acts of love to her will help her overcome the problems she's having. I KNOW there's something deeper with Saria that's wrong, I just have to figure out what that is so I can help her with it. But for now, I think that her having the music playing softly, and her and I having a nice mom to daughter chat each morning will help with her anger problem at school at least. I'll keep posting updates of course!

Not a very good day

So I had a phone conversation with Saria's teacher today, and basically she's concerned with Saria's behavior in the same ways that I am. We discussed her behavior at home and at school. Basically, she behaves the same way in both places. First off, we talked about how she's an excellent student academically when she applies herself, but socially she's not doing well. She throws fits in class, to the point where she is removed from learning for periods of time and this not only disrupts HER learning, but it disrupts the entire classroom from learning. Saria doesn't seem to GET that when she does something BAD or WRONG that she is punished for it, she just THINKS she's the victim everytime, and that we're punishing her because we don't like her. One of the things stated was thinking about having her repeat first grade because maturity wise, she's not going to be able to handle 2nd grade. We also talked about having her seen by a pediatrician who can maybe diagnose a problem (because we've both tried several things and nothing seems to be working) and I think that this would be the best option for Saria. They have a learning program set up in the schools that if Saria were diagnosed with a behavioral problem she'd have access to this program which would help her learn in my opinion because she'd be with teachers that understand her problem and can help her overcome the maturity issue...Sounds like a solution right? Have her seen by a doctor that can either help US to determine what the issue is, or get her started in a special program at school. If we did take her to a doctor MY feelings on medication are that they can pretty much stuff it, I will not do that to Saria. I personally think that either they'll diagnose her as having a behavior problem and we can go on from there, or they'll at least give us more options then what we've already tried. My main focus is on Saria, and the goodness that Saria is, not ignoring the problem and hoping it'll correct itself. I really don't know what the best choice is, but her teacher and I have both been praying for her, and we are pretty much at our wits end when it comes to a solution, we've tried it all.

Hoppy Beaster!!

Okay, so NOTHING ever goes as planned amirite? First, on Saturday I spent a good oh I'd say at LEAST 30 minutes filling about 300 eggs with candies and struggling to keep them away from the kids *mostly Ben* only for Saria to start throwing up around 11:30 that evening. Needless to say, Brad and I didn't get a lick of sleep Saturday night. Sunday morning was rainy, Saria was still feeling a little under the weather (even though she only threw up once she just looked ill and wasn't acting herself) so we didn't even go to church...Instead, we used that time to sleep off the night before (plus I was feeling a little under the weather myself-I'm sure it's directly related to the no sleep thing) When we woke up, Brad called over at Mom's and let them know that we weren't going to make it for dinner because Saria was sick and we weren't sure if it was the flu and didn't want to risk giving it to Grandpa. Needless to say, she STILL looked a little flushed even though she said she felt better. Around four the weather got a little nicer, sun peeked out at us, so I took a shower and took my three full buckets and the box I had of stuffed plastic eggs and went outside to hide them. We thought with having such a large yard that hiding all our eggs wouldn't be a problem...haha yea right!! We STILL ended up basically tossing them on the ground, but that's okay, because the kids had a blast and even Ben caught on after a few minutes, I think he actually got the most eggs. After we were done with the little egg hunt, Brad made the kids Mac and Cheese for dinner and they went to bed soon after. It took about five tries to get Saria out of bed this morning, poor thing, I hope she got enough sleep to recover fully.