Cucumbers, Peppers, Tomatoes OH MY

I planted cucumbers, peppers, tomatoes, eggplant (wow I planted soooo much stuff), chives, basil, summer squash, lettuce...I think that's it!
It was really fun to have the kids outside "helping" me. They really didn't do anything but stare at me the whole time but I'm sure they learned something!!
Now for the prayers that the things will actually grow. I know it's a little too soon but as soon as i publish this, I'm going to go take a peek at the little greenhouses I have.



Oh hey, you like how I've been blogging regularly? I know its only been for three days now so I am not going to promise that I keep it up, but I'm going to TRY a little harder :)

Me and My Red Thumb

As long as I can remember I've wanted to have indoor plants, flower beds outside, gardens...
I am not sure what I do to them, or.. if I am just cursed, but EVERYTIME I bring home a plant or try to grow a garden...it dies...Saria has even had growing seeds in school that she has proudly taken home which have died days later. Last year I tried to do a garden with a buncha herbs and veggies and it was going really well and when we got back home from a weekend trip everything was roasted and dead from the sun. SO I am determined to make one that works..and upon seeing Miss Hila's tomatoes.. and being JEALOUS, I'm going to nerd up on it (read, research) to keep the plants alive this year..please wish me luck, and even say a prayer, because having the DEADLY Midas Touch sorta depresses me..

An old Pair of Shoes

When I was a teenager I owned this awesome pair of shoes that I was so proud to have purchased at the dollar store for 2 dollars and 50 cents. I remember this now because I actually had a dream about this particular pair of shoes not too long ago. I KNOW the reason I had the dream was to settle my mind because for the past few months I've not talked to a couple people in my family, and these shoes are proof to me that I'm not necessarily RIGHT in not talking to them, but that my reasonings are valid.

I could go off into a tangent and type for hours, but no matter how I begin, it ends the same way. PITY ME!!!! BOO HOO ME!!!

I think after 27 years of this treatment, it's time to let it all go.

I am tired of forgiving people that are supposed to love me, but I always will.

I am proud of the way my life turned out, proud of the family that I have, and proud of where I am in life, and cannot POSSIBLY understand why the people that are supposed to love me cannot be proud of me.

Live today to the fullest because you are not guaranteed a tomorrow.


All children need love from both of their parents (BOTH)
and while all children are not the same, they should be LOVED the same

I've always been the black sheep in some form or another, and the funny thing is.. I keep allowing it to happen.

Its time to let it go...I'm moving on, and I wanted you to know that while I will always hurt inside, I'm letting go..

Tax time Blues

So, we go to file our taxes because we have plans with that money this year.. plans to pay off Brad's truck, switch our van payment to the second half of the month to balance out the bills better, and buy new tires for the van...we can't file the taxes yet.. because we need a form sent to us which we haven't received yet. SOOOOO in the meantime.. my van cannot be driven because it has 2 bald tires on it (Brad drives it, I just will not) and today (Valentine's Day!!!) Brad gets a phone call to go to a job, so we stop reading the tail end of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows (he's been reading the entire series to me even though I've already read them, it's something we've begun to do as a couple) and he goes to start his truck and his truck won't start...He calls his dad and his dad tells him it sounds like it's the catalytic converter-200 bucks, but since it's SUNDAY nothing is open to get it fixed.. In the meantime, he's gotta go to work so he puts his truck in reverse hoping to get it outta the driveway to be able to pull the van out and LO and behold if we don't live on a FREAKING HILL and his truck goes the opposite way he wanted it to, and even with me trying to help push it we couldn't move it to where it was completely outta the way, so ya.. its sitting mostly off the road, but a smidge is still on the road. AS IF THAT WASN'T BAD ENOUGH he accidently locked the keys in the truck so we had to break off the plastic knob on the window in the cab of the truck, stick Ben in there to open the door.. and after five minutes it was clear Ben didn't know what the heck we were asking him so we had to get Samuel to finally open the door and get the keys out. AS IF THATTTTTTT WASN'T BAD ENOUGH we're all pretty sick and the kids have been running fevers as well as myself (which is probably one of the reasons I couldn't push that truck at all.. I'm kinda weak from being sick for the past week) and I've been struggling with trying to get Ben to eat/drink/nap as often as possible because last night his fever was like 103.5. It's gone down a bit since last night, but he still has a mild fever...I think its time to try to ENJOY today...maybe a nice hot steak will do the trick..

Fa la la la la, my wallet's empty

SO we've been doing a little bit of Christmas shopping and so far we really haven't gotten much but the prices are outrageous...I'm looking forward to shopping again soon, because we all know how exciting shopping is!! (no sarcasm this time) I actually like Christmas shopping, I think because I'm not trying to find something for myself and am instead trying to think of cool things to get the kids.. :) As of other news, not much is going on.. Brad's been doing lab tests lately and MAYBE when they get the lab set all up in his office in Fife he will actually be PUT in there and have a work schedule.. and maybe MORE PAY? :) But other than that.. same ol same ol...House is in desperate need of some TLC (Tarylyn's Lovely Cleaning) SO I must get off this blasted machine...Oh, I'm mostly on facebook during the day, and I think that because my life is just not that spectacular in terms of GREAT news to report I've neglected my blog for these reasons.. I always say I will try to play catch up and get this updated more, but well.. we all know that isn't gonna happen :) <3 to all :))

Enjoying the weather

I absolutely love the rain, the sound it makes as it falls here is amazing because most of the time it's not followed by thunder and lightning. It's been reaalllly windy the past few days, think all that is cleared up now though because it's not even raining right now. I just enjoy this time of year. I love the warmth of the wood stove!! :)

My absence

I really didn't expect to not blog about my last post, but I think I just realized that people can COMPLETELY change and I think I am one of those people. I was brought up in a family that drank, got drunk, partied, etc just about every flipping weekend and I learned to loathe it because I saw just how absolutely STUPID people looked/acted when they were drunk. I grew up in a home that didn't actively go to any church and freely used language that was inappropriate (in my eyes). I just have changed so much since being married to Brad and regardless of what my family may think, I think I am a heck of a better person now than I was 10 years ago. I did enjoy my sister's visit, but it was NOTHING like how I planned it. We did have a lot of fun, but to be honest...we didn't spend much time together outside of roadtrips. Not that that is a big huge deal, but it wasn't what I was expecting after not seeing my sister for three years.
I guess this brings me to my most current rant...you know, family sometimes just...WOW. I have 2 parents that I love, and am most thankful for because they gave me life, but I feel so completely estranged from them that talking to my dad feels like talking to a complete stranger, and having a mother that wonders about my kids constantly but can't take five minutes out of her day to call me on my birthday when I know for a fact that she calls my sister every EVERY flipping day drives me... NUTS. Jealous? sure, who wouldn't be? I've been treated this way for 27 years and quite frankly should be used to getting the short end of the stick, but quite obviously I'm not because I'm blogging about it. I think the biggest thing for me is I just can't understand WHY...or WHAT is wrong with me that I cannot have the same love and affection given to me that is given to others. Its really not a big deal, REALLY it isn't, but you know what...I am just tired of it. I actually moved to Washington State, the decision to do that was made so much easier by the fact that I was trying to run from my problems. I am glad Washington is as beautiful and lovely as it is (and thankful for the family that I have here) because the problems followed me. But through everything...I am so thankful for the choices I have made and the life that I live. People may not like me for it, but I know that I am a better person. And if you cannot accept me for who I am, then that is your decision and it's on your shoulders, not mine.